breakfast in the backyard trumped breakfast in bed this morning.
i could not wait for the eggs to be scrambled and the tortillas to be warmed and the juice to be poured while the warm sun called and the crazy loud birds sang and everything was green, green, green.
spring mornings can be so awe inspiring.
all of this new life bursting forth from ground and branch.
but it was not just the beauty that beckoned.
my freshly woken mind was cluttered and i craved peace more than my pillow.
but the sight of our potager and an unfinished tree fort made my heart ache a bit.
i love this little lot of land we call our own.
but i know it is not really mine at all, for all is a gift and i need to unclench my hands from all that i love too much.
but my heart still ached a bit.
a tray of yummy food to feed the belly and soul arrived.
little voices told me, "happy mama's day!"
little hands drew me sweet pictures.
hugs, kisses, and bedhead to spare.
that heart ache eased.
jesse was to leave us for honduras this afternoon.
a week of perception shifting and eye opening and heart filling service.
a week of relationship building and God moving and lives changing.
but instead he will be staying home.
instead he will be looking for a new job.
being laid off from work with no notice is a punch in the gut.
how are we doing?
shocked and maybe a bit numb.
but also maybe good and hopeful.
because we have the opportunity to trust.
finger, by finger, unclenching our hands and holding them up in praise to the One we love and serve.
i am not trying to be rose colored glasses about this.
it is a big deal.
there will likely be some harsh realities to face.
what's new, i ask.
but this is not the unbearable.
we'll be wise with our spending and prayerful of our planning.
we'll return the rose bush to the nursery instead of planting it for my mama's day gift.
this is life.
His promises hold true and we will still seek to bring Him glory.
our goal is to find a new job close by.
but if glory-bringing means moving across the country, we will do it with joy and trust.
and lots of deep breaths.
happy mama's day, friends.
this post from last year pretty much sums up my thoughts on it all.